Financial stability is something most people crave when it comes to relationships, but many miss the red flags, according to experts.
The team at She’s on the Money talked about red flags on their Instagram page, including refusing to talk about money and chronic overspending.
The women liked to highlight the “clumsy, uncomfortable warning signs that this may not be the soul mate you want.”
Victoria Devine, pictured, founded the She’s on the money podcast and emphasizes the importance of being open about money
The main financial red flag for people in romantic relationships is the inability to talk about money with your partner.
This can lead to confusion about spending habits, savings goals and whether or not you are a good fit as a couple.
One woman said she would run away immediately if she noticed her partner couldn’t talk about money.
“Start talking about money early and often! And if they don’t want to say goodbye,” she captioned the post.
If your partner borrows money and doesn’t pay back, you should be hearing warning bells, according to the podcasters.
Being pressured to open a joint bank account is another big red flag, they said, adding that it’s important to be able to talk about and stick to your own boundaries.
The fourth big red flag is when your partner lives “way beyond their means.”
It can look like overspending on shopping, racking up debt with new cars, buy-now-pay-later schemes, and not budgeting properly.
In the post, the women also asked if anyone else had any financial red flags they’d like added to the list.
And people were happy to oblige.
“You should just add gambling to the list, right?” a woman wrote.
If your partner is constantly living beyond their means, that’s a huge red flag and needs to be talked about
While another said having a partner who “has the final say in how joint savings are used” is a big red flag for them.
What are the four major financial red flags for adult romantic relationships?
1 – Don’t talk to your partner about money
2 – Your partner borrows money and never pays it back
3 – Your partner pressures you to open a joint account
4 – Your partner lives way beyond his means
One woman said she felt uncomfortable when her partner wanted to know how she spent her money.
Another money expert, Shahirah Gardner, previously spoke to FEMAIL about relationship red flags, agreeing that it’s important to talk about money early.
For Shahira, no savings, an unstable job, living week to week and drowning in debt were the four biggest red flags.
She explained that saving is important because it shows “self-discipline and respect for financial goals.”
Financial instability was her next big red flag: ‘If they have stability in the workplace, their chances of stability at home are much higher. Not to mention, it’s harder to pay bills and plan vacations if you can’t guarantee a steady income.”
The third, drowning in debt, is important because sharing a life with someone means sharing debt – directly or indirectly.
Living paycheck to paycheck is the next big red flag for Shahirah, despite half of all Australians reporting doing so.
‘While it seems almost inevitable to many young Aussies, how quickly does your partner run out of money? If it’s payday and they’re already counting down to the next one, be careful.”
Financial red flags should be evaluated from the moment you meet, and monitor the progress of the entire relationship as circumstances change.
What are first date financial red flags?
The top red flags as revealed by singles actively involved in the dating scene.
1 – Show off your wealth – 46% of people found this off putting
2 – Ordering the most expensive thing on the menu – a red flag for 37%
3 – Refusal to admit financial privilege – a big no for 30% of people
4 – Gender rules or expectations for paying the bill – disliked by 28%
5 – Paying everything with a credit card – a red flag for 27% of people
What are the three month red flags?
After you get through the first date, it’s important to watch for red flags for the first three months.
1 – 52% of people found partners who acted richer than they actually are a turn off
2 – 43% look for job instability
3 – 40% are concerned if partners are secretive about their income
4 – 38% see buy now pay later schemes as a red flag for three months
5 – 33% of people think long-term credit card use is a problem
It is important to be able to talk about money with your partner, if you can’t then there are problems
So Syncd relationship expert Jessica Alderson said some red flags take longer to show up, while others should be considered instant deal breakers.
These include paying everything on credit, flaunting your wealth, refusing to admit financial privileges, and ordering the most expensive thing on the menu.
It’s good to make a first date decision when the red flag is obvious. It’s much better to break things off quickly than get into a toxic relationship that can be very damaging in the long run,” she said.
How should I bring up finances with a new partner or on a first date?
1 – Don’t be afraid to split the bill
If you’re dating, be upfront about who pays and what you can afford. You shouldn’t feel the need to pay for something you can’t afford.
You can broach the subject lightly by suggesting how they want to pay at the start of your meal, for example. This way you avoid arguing about money towards the end of the date.
2 – Listen and learn
You can learn a lot about someone on a first date, and even at the start of a new relationship, by listening to their values, hobbies, and goals. Observe what their lifestyle is.
Are they frugal? Or are they open about luxury? Doing this will help you better understand them as a person and whether their goals align with yours.
3 – Share your values
Your values make you who you are. And an important part of any relationship is being honest about what you want in life.
So share your financial goals. Do you want to become the owner of your home? Buy a van and travel the world? You can then see how compatible you really are.
4 – Don’t pry into the relationship too early
If you wouldn’t ask a friend about his credit score, you might want to put that topic off on the first date.
If they aren’t as open as you are regarding money, it doesn’t mean you can’t continue dating. They may need more time to open up to the conversation.
Instead, get to know them gradually and along the way you will learn more about their values when it comes to money.
5 – Don’t impose your own financial goals
While you may be confident and sure of your financial goals, it doesn’t mean that the person you’re dating has or even has the same values. Let them be upfront about their own goals and see if they match.
Source: Money Supermarket
“Sometimes things get lost in translation on a first date, though, so if you’re not sure if something is really a red flag, go on another date and observe carefully to see if there are more behaviors that help your doubts.” elucidate .’
Money Super Market financial experts agreed, noting that while 27 percent of people think using a credit card for every purchase is a red flag, it may not be.
Credit cards can be a sign that you understand how to manage your money. A credit card, when used correctly, can help your credit score and ensure your credit rating is healthy, making it easier to take out a loan or even get a mortgage,” they explained.
The real red flag that your date may have a spending problem is if they rely on “buy now, pay later,” they said.